Time to get serious

aaaah, back in st. pete and half an hour before leaving for work. New York was incredible... it just comes to show that some things you just can't price. 570 dollars for the flight is a lot of money, but the experience was worth every out credit card, and the replacement iphone that i had to buy, after leaving mine on the pl maxed ane (I know... I really have a problem). Today I talked to some credit card companies, and all of them said that I'm still cool. I put a hold on my visa, and things should get back to normal soon.

i really love mark. he's such a great support, and it's great to be with someone who is so similar to me regarding goals, what is most important to us in life, and how we handle things expect he's way smarter and much calmer. i hope i can get it together, if not for myself, at least to keep this mark dude around ;-)

meeting his family was a little intense... his father picked us up from the airport and launched into a 20 minute lecture, what florida republicans Mark should vote for. mmmh, uncomfortable haha. his mother was a little nicer, and even managed to give me a hug at the end of the trip. after the first night we spent a night with Mark's sister Katy and her boyfriend... they were both super nice, and really great to be around. we drank tons of beer and played shit loads of games. I'm not sure if they liked me as much as I liked them, but it was still great. Plus I need to just worry about Mark. If he's bringing me along, and he trusts that myself is good enough, I should just trust his judgment and not worry so much about impressing his family and friends.

Ok ok, now I really need to get rolling... later!

flight 3845

man, i'm really living up to my screen name these days... a big fat fucking traincrash. tomorrow is my planned trip with mark to new york... is supposed to be. I just found out that I booked the flight for last month! fuck fuck fuckedy FUCK! so the ticket is an xtra 300 bucks to have switched... now... try to max out my discover vs. pissing off the boyfriend in a most major way!!! Actually I already decided... I'm on hold with southwest as I'm typing this praying to this blog that I can use my discover... or even better, that my dear father will call me back in time and tell me that he's gonna use some frequent flyer miles. speaking of my father... that man is unreachable, even his secretary doesn't know where he is. well she said he might be at lunch, but the man isn't picking up his cell... maybe he's back. to his old ways... no good!

ah, see how i just tried really hard to distract my mind? worked for a minute there... grrr, why does hold music always remind me of the shining? not a movie i like to be reminded of when stressed for sure. ok, i know it's 12:34 noon, but I think the circumstances call for a major bong hit... brb... much better. the hold-music now reminds me of charley brown, and i love woodstock! although now i'm def not looking forward to talking to the operator, especially with the prospect of my card being declined... pooh, that would majority blow. aaaah, i'm killing my own buzz.

ok, i'm probably better off looking at something funny on youtube.... later!

Salmon, Filet, and xtra Salad

happy tuesday. the second day of the week... a second chance for a decent day :-) I just got off the phone with Cassy and she always know how to take my mind off of things. She is really into meditating, and just listening to her being able to push energy back and forth, make stuff warm and cold, and to make colors spurt out of your chest with your orgasm... all sounds really interesting. She referenced some book about the female orgasm. Apparently there is one on the male orgasm... all in all pretty interesting. Improving my orgasm doesn't really fall under one of my top priorities... maybe this is my problem!!! Ok, improving my orgasm just moved to the top of the list, see how easy that was?!

Yesterday Miss Cowen died... I loved that lady. I've been waiting on her, her husband and son for almost 4 years, and and the incredible age of 94 she passed. Allen and his father came in after her wake, and as soon as I saw her missing I knew... :-( But I guess 94 years is a pretty incredible run!

Fierce People

today i was handed a big fucking cup of humility, when I had to accept Judith's offer to pass on rent this month, I had to borrow 100 bucks from Sabine to avoid overdraft fees, and another 10 bucks from Cassy to avoid them again... oh and that $500 min payment waiting at the end of October... what the fuck happened?

right?!?

Lol, I was just watching an interview with the pet-shop boys (spelling?!?) and they were asked this question: What is the most beautiful thing in the world? and i thought about it, and I decided!!! The most beautiful thing is the feeling of completion! tricky though... pet-shop boys gave some lame-ass answer no-one would ever give a shit about btw ;-) Grrrrr, so deep I am. no wonder I'm a server!!!

nasty

i need someone to look up to... i really do!

Iron Man

Man, it's been a while (as always). I'm currently sitting on my bed, stoned, having a high life, 'my life on the d-list' in the background, while re-playing the events of the evening over and over in my head :-). No major events, just my recent decision to keep my iPod in my car on shuffel, and rediscovering some cool ass old school music... such as Andre 3000 and Kelis's Dracula's Wedding... "give me the chance, to dance romance, don't run I'm not the sun! So much at stake, bad choice of words, because I'm not the gun." brilliant. Plus, I realized that my favorite song of all times must be 'iron man' by The Cardigans. Mainly since this is the 3rd time I've made that reference while blogging. Oh good times. Oh man, I'm sitting on my bed right now, and I can still smell my man on my sheets... best smell ever :-) Just imagining snuggling up with him in these sheets makes me feel so much more at home! Fuck... cheesy cheesy deezy! The song 'iron man' really reminds me of my boyfriend by the way... very cool.